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A chance every minute arrived. Id ask the American people to think about how they can get our government to change these laws to save lives and let our young people grow up, C. File image of Ari Lankan Army chief Ravi Wijegunaratne.

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Lesotho and Mozambique at the summit. in its past, "You have to check out dune bashing: the surge the speed the heat the views") Warning It is not just what you say but also how you say it; the inspiring tactic demands conviction energy and passion When deploying this tactic a dreary demeanor will leave you floundering Deliver inspiration like it matters more than life itself and youll be pretty much invincible 3 Asking Questions What Is It "Would you like to be rich" Asking questions encourages the other person to make their own discovery of your conclusion (or something similar) Give Me an Example I am walking through the airport when a woman with a clipboard approaches me from in front of a large advertising board and asks "Do you have a credit card" I utter a dismissive "Yes" and keep walking "Do you get airline miles with your card" she persists "Yes I do" I reply slightly irritated and carry on walking "Do you use your airline miles" The truth is I dont but Im not going to get caught up in this conversation "A bit" I reply but my walking slows "Would you rather have cash" I stop turn and look at her for the first time "Do you have five minutes to fill in a form to get a credit card that gives you cash" she asks In five questions I have been persuaded to do something I havent done in over a decade: switch to a new credit card When Is It Useful This is a great tactic when it is important that the other person feels responsible for the outcome In coaching and counseling for example a course of action or therapy is much more effective when the other person believes it was their idea rather than when they grudgingly give in Asking questions is also useful when youre trying to persuade someone who has more power than you maybe your boss ("Do you think Im overdoing it" "Do you struggle with work life balance How do you deal with it") or your client ("Are you happy with the gold service Or do you ever wish you had the platinum") Warning This is one of the hardest tactics to use because it is impossible to know how the other person will respond If the questions are too broad then you are likely to veer off course; if they are too narrow the other person will spot what you are up to and may refuse to cooperate But while most of the other tactics get weaker if theyre used too much asking questions is a tactic that has an extended battery life its effective time after time 4 Cozying Up What Is It "Youre a smart guy" If you feel positive toward someone you are much more likely to agree with them and you almost always feel positive toward someone who makes you feel good about yourself This is the cozying up tactic Give Me an Example "Hi Sandra Youre looking well I heard from Mark that you did a great job on the Johnson case Not an easy situation well done I have a challenging case coming up in October and am pulling together a top-level team to work on it Would you be interested" When Is It Useful Cozying up is a particularly good tactic to use when youre trying to influence people with less or the same level of power as you because they are likely to value your views Many of us use it on our partners ("Darling you look like a million bucks") our friends ("I know you are someone I can trust") and our clients ("Youre the sort of person who will really appreciate this because youre smart") The danger with cozying up is that if youre too obvious when using this tactic youll have the opposite effect ("Youre only saying that because you want me to do something for you") As a result some people avoid it altogether They are missing out A less risky approach is to leave timesometimes even several days between making someone feel good about themselves and trying to persuade them Warning Using cozying up on someone who clearly has more power than you can look like sucking up So unless you know what you are doing be mindful about how much kudos youre sending out into the world 5 Deal Making What Is It "If you pick me up from the airport I will " Deal making is when you offer or give another person something in return for their agreement with you It may be explicit but it doesnt have to be Give Me an Example "I promised a friend I would walk his dog while he was on vacation Then tonight I was offered Beyoncé tickets at the last minute Ill buy you dinner if you come over and watch the dog while Im at the concert" When Is It Useful Deal making is useful when you want to increase the odds in your favor and dont mind giving something away in return Sometimes it is necessary to be up front ("If you help me paint the bathroom Ill cook dinner every night next week") At the same time the deal can work better when the connection is only implied ("Sure Ill introduce you to my sister" and then twenty minutes later "Can you really get me into the VIP section at the golf tournament") Often deal making is most effective when the connection is all but invisible like its something you would have done for one another without a deal Warning This tactic works by appealing to a desire for fairness Some people can "take take take" without feeling any remorse or indebtedness (or they may just think youre a generous fool) Deal making wont work with this type of person unless you are very up front about the terms of the exchange 6 Favor Asking What Is It "Can you help me out" Favor asking is simply asking for something because you want or need it but youre not offering anything in return Give Me an Example "My guest speaker has just pulled out of the event Im organizing next week All I can say is that Id be eternally grateful if youd be willing to step in and give a speech to my group" When Is It Useful This tactic works well only when the other person cares about you or their relationship with you If used sparingly it is hard to resist Warning The person you ask for a favor might feel that you owe them one in the future If you think they do make sure you "pay back" the favor or you wont get such a positive response next time 7 Using Silent Allies What Is It "Everyone who has read this book so far [email protected] SJP was snapped out in N. leaving 41 people dead and over 260 injured.